“The Truth, the Whole Truth, and Nothing Misleading in the Headline.”
The Media Integrity Council exists to uphold the trustworthiness, clarity, and ethical conduct of journalism throughout the Kingdom of Eyehasseen. While the press is free to publish what it wishes, it is also kindly reminded by the Council that freedom and responsibility are not, in fact, mutually exclusive.
The Council monitors media across all forms—print, broadcast, digital, and town criers with flair—and offers both guidance and gentle correction to those who stray into the territory of wild speculation, poor punctuation, or excessive exclamation marks.
🧭 Core Responsibilities
📏 Standards of Journalism
Establishes and updates the Kingdom’s Journalistic Code of Accuracy, Tone, and Margin Justification, ensuring reports are fair, fact-based, and correctly spelled.
📢 Monitoring of Media Channels
Monitors the nation’s publications, broadcasts, and public statements for errors, exaggerations, and enthusiastic use of ellipses. Investigates misinformation with the calm authority of someone who’s already read all the footnotes.
🧾 Correction & Response Registry
Maintains a public record of retractions, clarifications, and royal “sternly worded notes” issued to media entities that have strayed.
🧠 Public Trust Index
Publishes a quarterly measure of public trust in Eyehasseen’s news sources, which is only slightly affected by whether or not tea was spilled during the latest royal affair.
🧑⚖️ Distinguished Members
- Lady Peregrina Winthrop, Chair of Integrity & Decorum
Believes in truth, fairness, and a strict embargo on headlines in all capital letters. - Mr. Julian Shrike, Reader Advocate
Once filed a formal complaint against a newspaper for calling a very mild drizzle a “Tempest.” It was upheld. - Canon Reginald Fael, Ecclesiastical Advisor on Public Morality in Media
Provides counsel on the difference between righteous critique and rude editorial cartoons.
📜 Recent Initiatives
- “Facts First, Flourish Later” – Seminar for young reporters.
- “The Public Has a Right to the Whole Paragraph” – Campaign for ending clickbait.
- Banned Phrases List (v.12) – Now includes “shocking twist,” “experts say,” and “unconfirmed sources whisper.”
“Free speech is sacred. Free nonsense is regrettable.”
— Lady Winthrop, on morning programs