“To Know, To Record, To Inform—Gracefully.”
The Ministry of Truth is charged with the oversight, preservation, and presentation of truth throughout the Kingdom of Eyehasseen. Whether through speech, symbol, broadcast, or parchment, it ensures that the citizens of the realm are well-informed, properly educated, and occasionally corrected—always with care.
It coordinates all efforts related to national communication, public narrative, scientific inquiry, and historical record-keeping. While the Ministry operates with dignity and discretion, it does see rather a lot.
🧭 Principal Offices of the Ministry
🎙️ Office of Propaganda
Charged with presenting truth attractively and memorably, the Office of Propaganda ensures that every public message is clear, stirring, and appropriately framed with banners, slogans, and artistic flare.
“Even truth needs good posture.”
📡 Communications Agency
Licenses and regulates all press and broadcast services, manages public airwaves, and ensures that the Kingdom’s message is both well-organized and moderately audible, even in the rain.
“Broadcast with order, print with purpose.”
📰 Media Integrity Council
Upholds the standards of journalism, investigates misleading headlines, and maintains the ever-watchful Index of Approved Terminology, which recently expanded to include “misadventure” and “unexpectedly interpretive reporting.”
“The truth, the whole truth, and nothing misleading in the headline.”
🔬 Scientific Inquiry Commission
Oversees research and discovery, ensuring that new knowledge is accurate, useful, and unlikely to explode unexpectedly. The Commission prides itself on peer-reviewed clarity and an extremely clean laboratory aesthetic.
“Advancing knowledge with integrity (and the occasional explosion).”
📚 Office of Historical Accuracy
Preserves, verifies, and occasionally rewrites the Kingdom’s historical record—but only when the facts themselves beg for correction. Maintains strict control over timelines, footnotes, and dubious family legends.
“Preserving the past, precisely.”
“To know the truth is noble. To tell it well is civilization.”
— Royal Charter of the Ministry of Truth, Article I