International Commerce Office – Ministry of the Exterior | Kingdom of Eyehasseen
“To count, to weigh, to charge—but always with courtesy.”
📘 Overview
The Tariffs & Duties Regulations Office (TDRO) oversees the lawful collection of customs, tariffs, tolls, import dues, export seals, and ceremonial levies at all recognized points of entry into the Kingdom of Eyehasseen. It ensures that the movement of goods, relics, exotic fruit, suspicious baubles, and enchanted scrolls is both orderly and taxed according to ancient practice and contemporary parchmentwork.
Established in 1953, originally as the Royal Toll Ledger, the Office was restructured under the Ministry of the Exterior after a brief but chaotic era known as the “Free Trade Picnic.” Since then, the TDRO has built a reputation for firm but fair taxation, detailed item cataloging, and extremely well-dressed customs officers.
📜 What We Do
- Assess tariffs and duties on goods entering or exiting the Realm
- Maintain the official Eyehasseen Customs Code, including the “Table of Acceptable Curiosities”
- Issue levy exemptions for diplomatic parcels, essential relics, or especially moving works of art
- Conduct inspections at designated Border Guard checkpoints, market ports, and ceremonial causeways
- Prevent unlicensed export of artifacts, unauthorized magical commodities, and duplicate books of prophecy
🧾 Categories of Taxable Goods
| Category | Example Items | Tariff Tier |
|---|---|---|
| Common Trade Goods | Cloth, wheat, soapstone, non-violent instruments | 🟢 Low |
| Specialty Imports | Dried herbs, rare inks, fog-cured cheeses | 🟡 Medium |
| Arcane or Enchanted | Bottled whispers, glowstones, humming dust | 🔴 High |
| Prohibited Without License | Cursed items, love potions, animated footwear | ⚫ Seizure |
| Ceremonial Only | Sacred bells, civic mascots, gilded tax scrolls | Exempt |
Note: Sentient items must declare themselves.
📦 Procedures at the Border
- Present declaration scroll or trade manifest
- Submit goods for inspection (or allow summary divination)
- Pay assessed duty in coin, voucher, or symbolic offering
- Receive stamped parchment of passage
- Proceed to the nearest Polite Waiting Area for official nod and release
All transactions are recorded in the Royal Customs Ledger, reviewed biannually by the Council of Balanced Trade and Weights.
👤 Key Personnel
High Comptroller of External Valuation
Dame Ottrude Winleafe
- Oversees tariff schedules, enforcement policies, and the seasonal update of item classifications
- Known to carry three stamp seals and two magnifying glasses—one of which is decorative
- Once refused a toll-free import of “very fast mushrooms”
Master Examiner of Imported Rarities
Thadeus Brightmoss
- Handles arcane goods and ambiguous packages
- Fluent in seven kinds of customs forms, including one written entirely in diagrams
Clerk of Tokens and Exchange Medals
Miss Lira Coom
- Manages barter items, commemorative waivers, and Scrolls of Symbolic Value
🏆 Recent Developments
- Updated Customs Schedule for Goods from Neighboring Micronations, including Slabovia, Talossa, and the Gentle Empire of Softcloth
- Instituted the Three-Ring Registration Rule for oversized ceremonial items
- Unveiled the Tariff Transparency Scroll, translated into five regional dialects and one pictographic style
- Launched the Goods & Glows Hotline for reporting undeclared mystical trinkets
📬 Contact & Forms
Tariffs & Duties Regulations Office
Port Authority Hall, Ministry of the Exterior
📧 customs@eyehasseen.gov.realm
📞 +EHS-34-2025-TARIFF
Request scrolls and forms available at all entry points or by courier pigeon with proper satchel permit.