“Preserving the Past, Precisely.”
The Office of Historical Accuracy is the Kingdom’s official guardian of truth in memory. It exists to ensure that the story of Eyehasseen, from its misty origins to its present grandeur, is told faithfully, chronologically, and free from romantic embellishment involving improbable dragons or historically inaccurate pastry recipes.
The Office reviews all public histories, museum exhibits, royal biographies, and school textbooks to ensure that the events of the past are properly documented, sourced, and not suspiciously enhanced by anyone’s great-great-great-uncle’s sword collection.
🏛️ Mandate & Responsibilities
📜 Historical Verification
Reviews public materials for factual accuracy and ensures every monument, statue, and mural reflects the known and confirmed past. Raises a formal eyebrow at any mention of the “Battle of the Hundred Raccoons.”
🏺 Oversight of Museums & Archives
Provides accreditation and guidance to historical institutions. Ensures that artifacts are correctly labeled, and that “miscellaneous box” is not an accepted curatorial category.
🧾 Review of Official Narratives
Reviews and amends state histories, royal proclamations, and civic celebrations to reflect confirmed historical record—regardless of how dramatic the unofficial version may sound.
🕰️ Restoration of Forgotten Histories
Seeks out neglected or misrepresented figures from Eyehasseen’s past and restores them to their proper place in the national story.
🧑🏫 Key Staff
- Archivist-General Cedric Wormwell, Keeper of Dates & Dust
Refers to any undocumented historical anecdote as “aggressively anecdotal.” - Lady Agnes Blackthatch, Chief Curator of Lost Causes
Known for restoring the legacy of a forgotten 14th-century tax inspector. Claims it was “far more exciting than it sounds.” - Professor Martin Lell, Royal Historian Emeritus
Works exclusively with primary sources and an alarming number of magnifying glasses.
📌 Recent Projects
- “The True Account of the Founding of Port Winthel: Now With Fewer Pirates”
- “Unsung Heroines of the Bread Riots”
- “Timelines of Monarchs, Rewritten Without Guesswork or Songs”
“History is not written by the victors. It is corrected by the pedants.”
— Cedric Wormwell, Third Symposium on Historical Embellishment