🏛️ Eyehasseen Royal Museums

“Where Memory Is Preserved, and Meaning Occasionally Clarified”

The Eyehasseen Royal Museums exist not merely to collect, but to honour, wonder, and confound. Housed within the noble stone wings of the Royal Cultural Complex atop Parliament Hill, these institutions safeguard the Kingdom’s most treasured works—both artistic and historical.

Their doors are open to scholars, seekers, and the mildly curious alike.


🎨 The Royal Gallery of Art

Visit the Gallery →

A majestic hall of brushstrokes, ink, and iconography.
The Gallery contains:

  • Portraiture of saints, scholars, and moderately significant aristocrats
  • The famed triptych Vision at Bramblegate
  • The controversial Still Life with Onion and Map Fragment
  • Eyehasseen’s National Collection of Bunting-Inspired Modernism

Silent awe is encouraged, though well-mannered gasps are permitted.


🏺 The Royal Museum of History and Antiquities

Explore the Collection →

History is not a list of dates—it is the sound of footsteps in a marble hall, the scent of waxed scrolls, the echo of past arguments now considered “established fact.”

Here you’ll find:

  • The Sword of the Unconfirmed Duke
  • Fragments of the original Treaty of Footbridge
  • The Timeline Wall—a daring attempt to fit 1,000 years on 16 feet of stone
  • Artifacts from the Festival of Confused Saints (Year 776)

Guides are available for tours, translation, and gentle philosophical correction.


📜 Our Purpose

The Royal Museums exist to:

  • Preserve the aesthetic and cultural patrimony of Eyehasseen
  • Encourage public encounters with wonder, form, and footnotes
  • Celebrate the objects that define us—be they exalted or oddly shaped

Visit once, reflect often, and leave with more questions than answers.
(That, after all, is the mark of any good museum.)