“Where every day’s a local tradition, and nobody minds if you join in.”
The Kingdom of Eyehasseen is not merely a place to visit—it’s a realm to participate in. Our traditions are centuries old, or at least convincingly so, and we’re delighted to let you have a go at nearly all of them.
🏹 Guided Torchlit Walks of the Underground Tunnels
Beneath Inverness lies a network of tunnels built for defense, smuggling, and dramatic effect. Tours leave every hour, or whenever someone finds the key.
🎭 Attend a Night Parade in Honour of St. Joan of Arc
Join locals as they light up the cobbled streets with banners, brass, and occasional interpretive swordplay. Face paint optional but encouraged.
🛡️ Enlist for a Day at the War College
Spend a day under the gruff instruction of Blackstone Bastion’s finest. Learn to march, salute, and glare with authority. Actual combat discouraged, except on ceremonial Thursdays.
🎨 Heraldry Painting Workshop
Hosted by the Bureau of Names, Titles & Heraldic Declarations. Paint your own family crest, even if your family has never declared anything but “last slice.”
🎏 Watch the Annual Bunting Ceremony
Each year, miles of decorative bunting are ceremoniously raised by stewards in waistcoats. Bring a handkerchief—it’s more moving than you’d expect.
🐾 Wildlife Tours with the Beast Corps
Travel with expert handlers into the northern glens and wooded valleys. Spot deer, fowl, and the highly elusive marmalade fox. (Do not feed the fox, no matter what it tells you.)
Whether you’re in search of excitement or simply wish to look busy for your travelling companions, Eyehasseen offers ample diversions for all temperaments.